When it comes to premarital sex, what
are you told today???
Media, peers, parents,
and schools tell you ;
“Just make sure you
the same thing, but for completely
different reasons and in completely
The world tells you to use
protection so when you do choose to
have sex you might not have to suffer
the physical consequences, such as
pregnancy or disease.
protection is different. It isn’t a pill you
can take the morning after or in a box
you can buy at Wal-Mart.
does not just save your body but it saves
your heart a lot of pain, along with your
So what is God’s kind of
What does God say about
preserving ourselves for purity?
a look at what He has to say in His Word.
1. Preserve yourself for holiness.
It is God’s will that you should be
sanctified: that you should avoid sexual
immorality; that each of you should
learn to control your own body in a way
that is holy and honorable, not in
passionate lust like the pagans, who do
not know God; and that in this matter
no one should wrong or take advantage
of a brother or sister. The Lord will
punish all those who commit such sins,
as we told you and warned you before.
For God did not call us to be impure, but
to live a holy life. Therefore, anyone
who rejects this instruction does not
reject a human being but God, the very
God who gives you his Holy Spirit. —1
The body, however, is not meant for
sexual immorality but for the Lord, and
the Lord for the body…. Flee from
sexual immorality. All other sins a
person commits are outside the body,
but whoever sins sexually, sins against
their own body. —1 Corinthians 6:13, 18
God has said, be holy because HE is holy
( 1 Peter 1:15 ).
God can only be in the
presence of holiness and purity; that’s
why He sent His Son to die for us so that
we can live with Him and be declared
righteous when we believe in His Son.
when you say, “God, I’m going to ignore
your commands to avoid sexual
immorality and instead I’m going to do
what my boyfriend and I want to do,
are rejecting God and sinning against your
own body. God says to flee from sexual
actions outside of marriage because it is
not good for you. He desires that you be
holy because it is what’s best for you, and
holiness never brings heartache or pain to
you and others.
2. Protect Your Reputation and the
Then they can urge the younger women
to love their husbands and children, to
be self-controlled and pure … so that no
one will malign the word of God. —Titus
Do you not know that your bodies are
temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you,
whom you have received from God? You
are not your own. —1 Corinthians 6:19
The Titus women were to teach other
younger women how to be godly, how to
live in such a way that no one could say
anything bad about them and the Word of
Self-control and purity are signs of a
godly woman, of a woman set apart for
Christ. She loves her Lord so much that
she would rather live a holy, pure life than
give in to temptations that only promise
temporary pleasure, because she wants
no one to be able to say anything bad
about God’s children or God’s Word.
We, as Christians, are set apart from the
we are to look and act different
We are to reflect Christ and
the Holy Spirit within us.
Like it or not,
the world is constantly watching what you
do, to see if you act in a way that’s
different than them.
You declare yourself
a Christian, but do you act in the same
ways, do the same things, and go to the
same places as those who do not know
Why should they want to love and
obey the same God as you if you don’t
love and obey God’s commands?
they think about you is what they’ll think
You are not your own; you
are His, and therefore you should honor
Live in such a way that is above reproach
so that there is not even a hint of sexual
immorality in your lives.
If that means as
a couple never being alone but Christ is
glorified, so be it!
If that means always
keeping a door open if you’re in each
other’s rooms but the Gospel is not
maligned because of that, so be it!
means waiting to kiss or hold hands for
months after dating so no one can accuse
you of any immorality but instead want to
know whom your Lord and Savior is, then
so be it!
What it comes down to is, which
do you love more: yourself or Christ and
His Gospel, which saves souls for eternity
3. Protect Your Brother in Christ
“But I tell you that anyone who looks at
a woman lustfully has already
committed adultery with her in his
heart.” —Matthew 5:28
Matthew 5:28 gives a command to men
not to check out women.
I used to think
that guys are SUPPOSED to check out
girls; it’s only natural for them.
according to Jesus Christ, it’s the same as
them committing adultery in their hearts
against their future wife and it’s a sin.
what does that have to do with us?
If you knew you could save someone in
your family a lot of heartache and trouble,
would you try as hard as you can to do
Why would you not do the same for
your spiritual brother?
Well, I know it can
be weird to think about, but the guy you
date—if he’s a Christian—is your brother
in Christ. He is a part of your Christian
family. You can protect him by not
purposefully dressing in a way that will
make him look at you with lust.
daughter of the King does not
intentionally want guys to look at her and
thus they sin in their hearts.
of the King instead cares for her brother
in Christ by dressing in a way that does
not cause him to sin but instead lifts him
and glorifies God.
Protecting your brother not only happens
when you dress in a God-honoring
manner but also when you act in way that
does not cause him to stumble sexually.
He could be pressuring you to do certain
things and you are going along with him,
or you could be pressuring him. Either
way you are not protecting him, and
you’re not protecting his future wife. You
don’t know for sure if you both are
meant to be together, but you do know
that he has a future wife.
would it be if someday you have to tell
every wife of your boyfriends what
activities you both did with each other
behind closed doors?
Live in such a way
that you have nothing to be ashamed of
because you cared enough about your
brother in Christ to protect him from
4. Preserve Yourself for Your Intended
His left hand is under my head and his
right hand embraces me. Daughters of
Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse
or awaken love until it so desires. —
Song of Songs 8:3–4
His left hand is under her head?
hand embraces her?
This bride in Song of
Songs is now with her beloved, her
In a way, he’s snuggling her as
his wife. She knows the joy of having
been pure and now the beauty of God’s
intended plan for purity. She is with her
husband and is begging her sisters to not
awaken love until it (God) desires, which
is after marriage.
God desires the best for you and only
does good to His children, so when He
says, “Do not awaken love until it so
desires; flee and avoid sexual
immorality,” do it. Sex outside of God’s
will only brings hurt to you and others.
God is saying, “My child, I have something
beautiful and wonderful intended for you,
if only you will follow my ways and stay
pure, because sex the way I intended it is
only truly enjoyable within marriage.” He
will NEVER withhold good from you, and if
you trust God He’ll lead you down the
right path and take care of you.
For a husband,you must wait for your time
kiss your future wife because you know
every girl you date is someone’s wife,
and you don’t know if they were supposed
to be your wife and you won’t want to kiss
another man’s wife.
So when you start
dating,you must wait until God
make it clear that you are gonna be his
5. Protect Your Future Marriage
Marriage should be honored by all, and
the marriage bed kept pure, for God will
judge the adulterer and all the sexually
immoral. —Hebrews 13:4
The consequences of pre-marriage sexual
experiences will carry over into your
marriage, and you will have to deal with
them. They don’t just go away once you
get married. The past partners, the past
experiences, will come into your
relationship with your husband and even
your marriage bed.
There will be worries
from both sides: Am I good enough
compared to the other people?
comparing me to those other people?
The world tells you, “You need to try this
person to see if you’re compatible
sexually,” or “They might be the one, so
enjoy each other now.”
But God says,
“Trust me, I have someone intended for
you, and when you marry that person you
won’t ever regret saving yourself for that
because if you don’t, when you finally do
find that person, you will have wished
with everything in you that you had
waited and kept your marriage bed
A wise person once told me, “You will
never regret taking it too slow in
relationships, but you will always regret
going too fast.”
God has laid out a plan in Scripture and
has given you the tools to protect
yourself for sexual purity.
He has always
promised to do good for you and to you,
to save you from hurt and destruction
BUT you have to follow His
commands and walk in His will; anything
outside His will only brings you pain and
heartache. Eve started to doubt God and
started to think He was holding
something good back from her, when the
whole time He was trying to save her
from sin and wanted her and Adam to live
in His presence in the most beautiful
place ever created. But because she
doubted God’s goodness to her and
disobeyed His commands, sin entered the
world and Eve now knew heartache and
Do you trust the Savior who died on a
cross on your behalf, or are you starting
to doubt His goodness?
Do you trust that
He has a wonderful plan for you when He
If you have doubted before
and given in to temptation, you probably
know the pain it brings.
But God is saying,
“Come back to Me, and I will give you
rest. It’s not too late.”
There is always
forgiveness and grace with the Lord, no
matter what you may have done in your
past. He will redeem you if you let Him.
If you haven’t yet strayed from God’s will
in this area, stay strong, my sister!
will never regret it! God is not a liar; He
is only goodness and love, so let’s trust
Him in all things and His plan for us!
When it comes to premarital sex, what